Frustration. Disappointment. Again.
How can a relationship feel so painful? Your partner, husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend is most likely the person who upsets you the most. How can this be, when they are supposed to be the one who loves you the most, the one who is supportive and on your side?
The more you care, the more it hurts. That’s why it’s much easier to ignore the “bad” behavior of strangers – we just don’t care that much about them.
But when it hits home, it’s hard to ignore. We start complaining and try to make it stop.
Do you think that if s/he just understood you better then they’d change their behavior? Then I have bad news for you. Even when partners understand, they rarely change their behavior. And it’s not because he or she doesn’t love you, because they do.
“Well then, if they love me so much then why do they treat me that way!?”
The key is in the word, “treat”. The idea that they way other people act around us is a type of “treatment” and a reflection of how much they value us. Actually, people act the way they do because it’s best for them. It’s what they’ve learned to do over time, it feels natural and it’s ingrained! They can’t just suddenly stop doing what they’ve always done!
Or, can they?
As a woman, you often get put into a “box” about your value to society, and what your aspirations should be. There are palpable limits placed upon us in all areas of our lives: from the personal and social arenas to the professional. There are very real societal markers about the status (or lack of it) that women currently endure, such as lower earnings for the same work, fewer women in positions of authority at large corporations and in government. We encounter pre-conceived notions about who we are and should be from family, friends, coworkers, and strangers.
Sometimes things are said directly to us, such as a suggestion that we should smile and look happy (because we are a woman). Other times the communication is more subtle, such as the automatic assumption that a male coworker be appointed the lead on a team, even when you (a woman) had originated the idea for the project. It could be something said to or about another woman you know, and you make the association to yourself (because you are also a woman).
These limiting remarks surround us. It can be difficult to withstand this continuous stream of prejudging. It can seep into your psyche and create boundaries for you that limit who you are and what you do. They can hold you back and keep you from fully expressing who you are.
We can’t change society overnight, but we can learn how to empower ourselves and the other girls and women in our lives. Authentic empowerment means feeling good about yourself, feeling good about being a woman, and pursuing whatever dreams and aspirations you hold for yourself.
You can fully own your life, make decisions based on who you are, what your values are, and what makes sense for you at the time. You can recognize the value and worth of your abilities, talents, and work in the world and express it. You can realize your amazing potential, and obtain the resources you need to fully develop it. You can bring that full expression and potential to fruition and allow it to encourage and inspire others to do the same.
We don’t all have the same mission in the world. But unleashing the potential of half of the world’s population should be a primary goal for every individual, society, and country. RelateGreat Premier Coaching Services has a mission to empower woman to lead glorious lives of their own choosing. We are proud to have donated over $10,000 worth of coaching towards our mission.
If you would like to support us in our mission, please follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube, and comment using the hashtag: #RelateGreat.
Every woman can be beautiful.
Beauty isn’t makeup — it’s a state of being. It’s complete acceptance and appreciation of yourself. It’s an inner recognition of all your gifts and worth.
Beauty isn’t dependent upon getting recognition from others. Beauty is when your essential nature shines and radiates out to others who witness it.
Beauty comes from a complete and utter sense of security and sufficiency that leads to relaxation and poise. There is no sense of lack or desperation. Beauty is being self-possessed, not seeking admiration because there is no need.
Beauty is channeled from within and fills all your words and decisions. When you live a life of beauty, all your decisions come from a place of being self-centered and grounded. It’s never selfish because you don’t need to take anything from anyone else.
Beauty overflows into the room and into all of your actions so that others can benefit as well. Others experience a sense of goodness and rightness being around you. They understand on a deep level the natural state that resonates with their own soul. And that is why people love to be around someone who’s beautiful. Makeup will capture a look, but beauty is pure radiance and a feast for the soul.
Let me know your thoughts about feeling beautiful below . . . and please like and share!
It’s a great game with amazing athletes, throngs of cheering crowds, tailgate parties, and hilarious and entertaining commercials. So, what’s all the seriousness about?
Back in the 90’s, Super Bowl Sunday began to be associated with domestic violence. There were claims that domestic violence incidents peaked on that day. While it turned out to be not true, the association was formed in many people’s minds, and it served to raise awareness about this important issue.
Real predictors of domestic violence are jealousy and possessiveness as well as verbal abuse. These warning signs show that one partner wants to control the other, and they will escalate into anger and violence if that control is threatened.
No one needs to live that way, in fear and under the constant threat of anger and violence.
That’s why I’m running *Super Bowl special* this week on my book, Ending Anger: The Couple’s Guide. The Kindle version is only $2.99 this week so get your copy now! You can also buy the paperback on Amazon and receive the Kindle version for only $0.99 more through their Matchbook program. Give the paperback to help a friend and keep the Kindle version for yourself!
Let’s all get involved to make domestic violence a thing of the past!
If you liked this post, please hit the like button and leave a comment below. Thank you for your support on this issue.
FEATURE ARTICLE of the Unforgettable Embrace newsletter
Three Tips to Get Along with Your Family In the New Year
It’s a holiday time! Time to be with your family and enjoy some vacation time. It’s supposed to be joyous and fun. But you can be under a lot of stress because of rushing around, spending money and dealing with traffic. You can also find your loved ones getting on your nerves as you are together more than usual.
I encourage you to begin thinking about how you’re going to keep yourself calm and relaxed during the new year. You may want to focus specifically on how you’re going to improve your relationships with your family in the coming months. As you think about this, I have three pieces of advice that that I’d like to give you. You may use them to think about it and to help you stay calm and truly enjoy your holiday.
1. Do not let things get to you emotionally
One way of doing this is to start by counting to 10 and think about how things could be good. Wait before responding to things that upset you. In reality things are not really as bad as they seem.
Many of you are wondering what to do given the recent attacks in Paris and other cities such as Beirut. These events can make us feel angry, discouraged and helpless. We need to align our actions with our hearts.
Martin Luther King said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” If you look at your own life you will see that those words ring true.
Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.
We can chose how we relate to others, those who are different from us, those who are angry and lashing out. Anger and violence do not solve the problem, they only perpetuate and spread the suffering.
Choose love before you say or do anything. Help to heal the root problem so that lashing out is unnecessary. Let’s all choose to be part of the solution.
FEATURE ARTICLE of the Unforgettable Embrace newsletter
Why Won’t My Partner Give Me What I Need?
You love your partner and things between you two can be so good. But sometimes he or she can be so uncooperative! It is so frustrating!
Do you ever wonder why your partner won’t give you what you want?
You’ve probably tried many ways to get what you need. Sometimes you asked nicely. Maybe you pleaded and cried and begged. When that didn’t work you made demands, commanded them, or became hostile. You got angry, cursed and yelled at your partner. You called them names, or said they had a weak character. Ugh.
Maybe you blamed them for the breakdown your relationship and said it would create a permanent split. But even with all the silent treatments, angry words, avoidance, withholding of support, and everything you could think of to provoke them into action it still didn’t work.
* Is it that they’re completely incapable, and they can’t do it?
* Is it that they absolutely just don’t get it??
* Or is it that they refuse to do even though they could do it, out of spite, to be mean or controlling?
In the end, it really doesn’t matter if your partner can’t give you what you want or won’t. You still don’t get what you need!
But, there is an important truth about this situation and I want to share it with you right now because it will set you FREE!