Frustration. Disappointment. Again.
How can a relationship feel so painful? Your partner, husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend is most likely the person who upsets you the most. How can this be, when they are supposed to be the one who loves you the most, the one who is supportive and on your side?
The more you care, the more it hurts. That’s why it’s much easier to ignore the “bad” behavior of strangers – we just don’t care that much about them.
But when it hits home, it’s hard to ignore. We start complaining and try to make it stop.
Do you think that if s/he just understood you better then they’d change their behavior? Then I have bad news for you. Even when partners understand, they rarely change their behavior. And it’s not because he or she doesn’t love you, because they do.
“Well then, if they love me so much then why do they treat me that way!?”
The key is in the word, “treat”. The idea that they way other people act around us is a type of “treatment” and a reflection of how much they value us. Actually, people act the way they do because it’s best for them. It’s what they’ve learned to do over time, it feels natural and it’s ingrained! They can’t just suddenly stop doing what they’ve always done!
Or, can they?